A wise man once said, “a man who walks sideways through an airport turnstile is probably going to Bangkok”
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I started a band called 1023 Megabytes…
We still havent gotten a gig yet
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Local Police arrested two teenage boys overnight who were in possession of a car battery and fireworks.
They charged one and let the other off.
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I once had my penis in the Guinness book of records. The librarian told me to take it out
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If you ask Rick Astley for his copy of the movie ‘Up’, he cannot give it to you as he will never give you up.
However, in doing so, he lets you down.
This, creating the Astley paradox.
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I was in a car dealership the other day, and I was asking the dealer about cargo space.
He shook his head sadly and replied:
“Car no do that. Car no fly”.
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Local police have reported that somebody is stealing wheels from their Police cars.
Detectives are working tirelessly to catch them.
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This morning at 4:30am my neighbour started banging on the wall. Can you believe that? Lucky I was still up anyway playing music.
He banged and shouted “Can we have a bit of respect please?”
I shouted back “I’m not a big Aretha Franklin fan, but, sure, this one’s for you”.
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Just got home from the World Blindfold Wanking Championships … no idea where I came.
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In the 80s I was in a band called Prevention.
We were better than The Cure.
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I couldn’t work out why the basket ball kept looking bigger………………then it hit me.
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There are only 10 types of people in this world. Those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
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There are only two types of people in the world.
There are those who can extrapolate from incomplete information.
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There’s 2 types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate data…
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snap
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great minds…
Fools never differ 