My grief counsellor died recently.
Luckily he was so good I didn’t give a shit.
I saw a sign in Specsavers that said children should not be left without supervision. If they had that, they wouldn’t be in Specsavers.
My grief counsellor died recently.
Luckily he was so good I didn’t give a shit.
I saw a sign in Specsavers that said children should not be left without supervision. If they had that, they wouldn’t be in Specsavers.
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and the barman says “is this some kind of joke?”
A dyslexic fella walks into a bra
Two men walk into a bar. You’d think the second one would have ducked
A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, “why the long face?”. Horse responds, “why the small penis?”
A bear walks into the pub, barman says “what can I get you?”
bears says" I’ll have a .
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Pint please"
Barman says “Why the big paws?”
Bloke walks into a bar and the barman goes “streuth mate, that must’ve hurt”.
Bloke walks into a bar, but security rejects him after asking how many drinks he’s had and he replied ‘none tonight’.
Hmm I’m struggling with that 1 I must admit
What do you call a door that’s not a door?
A jar.
I’ve been feeling quiet sick and lethargic this week so I decided to go see my doctor today.
She told that I’m gonna have to stop masturbating.
I was shocked and asked why?
She said "Because I’m trying to examine you.”
Ah we’ve all been there
Me: [boards plane]
Flight attendant: Hello sir. Window, or Aisle?
Me: Window or you’ll what?
I went to visit a psychic.
I knocked on her front door. She yelled out “Who is it?”
So I left.
What do you call a Star Wars fan who is a responsible drinker?
Obi-Wan Peroni.
I’m going to be that guy and point out that this is asked at check in, not boarding.
The idea of this happening at boarding reminds me of going through RBTs with my dad as a kid. He was so eager to get his dad joke in that he’d always say “just a gin and tonic thanks” in reply to “would you please count to ten sir”
5 cougars thanks…
Im going to be that guy and point out that it’s not a question generally asked, most people book online