Seems to work for 80% of people…
80% of people are the most incompetent person in their workplace?
Obviously the most incompetent person in the workplace is the statistician.
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They are all equally incompetent, obviously.
The one in the offer I’ve been sent is 20% of salary for hitting target, 25% for 105% of target and 30% for 110% of target.
@Jabbatron I’ve had a similar situation. I was manging our UK office in 2020 when Covid hit, the Belgian head office made the other 4 people redundant, but I was told months in advance they were going to. Was really shit as I was friends with some of them, but legally I was not allowed to say anything.
When they were finally told, they knew I must have known for months and were a bit annoyed at me. But they wouldn’t have gotten their redundancy payouts if they just left for a new role (which was almost impossible to find in July 2020). Felt awful being the only one of the 5 who kept their jobs too.
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So my best friend at work, the lady I wrote about earlier, has tried to pick another fight with myself over the way we operate specific lab equipment. She’s claiming we’re not doing it right and especially without the correct documentation in place. We’ve now reviewed the entire system and have come to the conclusion that my team is perfectly fine. However her team hasn’t replaced multiple individuals that ran her safety systems and they’ve been carried out ad hoc. Could cause massive issues and will most likely require them to outsource for an external audit by an independent contractor as they don’t have the expertise.
Glorious day today! My favourite part was when she was claiming we didn’t have a safety officer in my team. Not realising that i’ve done the training 4 years ago, she just has zero requirement to know…
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Right, so an update on this.
I did go and speak to the recruiter but the job wasn’t for me… more sideways and with no more upside to what I am doing now.
However, got a call from another company, who want me to take over the region for them. Went and chatted with their CRO who happened to be in town from overseas. Was meant to be 45 minutes but we ended up having lunch… had a couple of follow ups and another one next week.
He is very open, they have me and one internal candidate that they are going to pick from. He wants someone with “fresh eyes and ideas” to drive the growth they need.
Fingers crossed!
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Good luck! Sounds like a change will do you good.
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Fuckwits like this are going to run it for the rest of us
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I wonder if they could counter sue claiming that she provided an unsafe working environment?
And that’s just going to really fuck it up for everyone else
Starting a new job next week, getting quite nervous about it now as it’s the first time I’ve changed job in 8.5 years. You never really know if it’s going to be better, what the culture is going to be like etc
Doing my final few days at my current company now and I’m very close to telling my boss to just fuck off, very hard to stay professional. She’s just asking me to do a shitload of extra shitty work in the final few weeks so she doesn’t have to do it next year, I think it’s being very cheeky. I’ve been busy packing up and closing down the office as I’m the only one working in London (they are going to replace me out of Belgium) so it’s been quite a lot of work doing that to start with, along with handing over all my work to someone else, making introductions, tying loose ends etc.
I left the office for the last time yesterday as the final bits were picked up by couriers, so working from home the rest of the week, decided I’m going to do the absolute bare minimum for her now, fuck it.
I was going to finish on the 31st, but they asked me to stay until the end of the week, I’ve just found out it’s because they have a bank holiday Friday and wanted someone to cover their work for the day 
good luck with that, I’ll be putting the out of office on that day.
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The person I hired for job A has been moved into job B (out of my department), no longer reporting to me - they start on the 7th. We were absolutely desperate for support and they were only hired as I was either going to end up in hospital with a heart issue, or die from the constant stress of work.
I’ve just been asked to put together their induction plan and fly to Melbourne to be there for half that week when they start.
“Oh they will be 50/50 in role A/B” - sorry doesn’t work that way, we have set timelines and just can’t drop something midweek because they need to do something else for the other department.
Have basically said I have zero interest in this arrangement and am not taking on something to manage if it’s out of my control, especially considering we have capacity issues as, having just kicked off a software implementation that is going to take up 80% of my time for the next month (which is why we pulled the trigger on implementing it now and paying the vendor because we thought we were getting a new staff member). If we don’t implement in the agreed timeframe we lose their support and have to pay them extra to assist.
The person who signed off on the software also signed off on changing this persons role a week before they started.
Basically any new request for support that comes in is now going to get the bare minimum attention and I can guarantee there will be massive complaints about it. The kicker is I’ve been begging for months to start rolling out training to up skill staff so they can be self sufficient and understand all the new process changes etc that we have gone through that no one fully understands but my team.
It’s the absolute perfect storm. Should be glorious to watch unfold, very much looking forward to the “I told you so” at the first signs of a crack, followed by “not my circus, not my monkey - you clean the shit up”.
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Finished with the old lot last Friday, start with the new lot on Nov 11th.
I had planned to bolt to Vietnam for a week, just for a quick break but circumstances conspired against me, so I’m wasting 2 paid weeks doing not much of anything.
First 2 clients already lined up and a busy pre-Xmas schedule, then 2 weeks off around Xmas and New Year.
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Well that didn’t last long.
I took a call with one of the project PM’s yesterday just to get a feel for the workload, I know the client well, he asked me to do some planning and I pointed out I don’t start till the 11th.
I had 2 calls today from the other project PM asking if I could meet with the client on Monday, again I pointed out that I don’t start till the 11th, he seemed surprised by this.
30 mins later I get a call from my new (and conveniently previous) boss who asked if I could start today.
So yeah, I’m now ITSM/SIAM Practice Lead at Epicon/Telstra Purple as of 11am today.
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I hope you’re on super special double contractor rates at least.
Rookie error answering calls outside business hours.
Had a person from internally in the company complain to our managing director because I was ignoring her phone calls. She called me at 8:00am on the dot that day. I politely told her to f*ck off
One of the best lines I’ve seen in a work email signature was someone who works overseas for a department here, they said that they work business hours over there, please do not think that an email received out of hours requires a response out of hours.
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Something similar is a standard signature for upper management at my work.
“If you have received this email out of hours it is because I chose to work flexibly. A response is only required during your working hours.”
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